Go away, fat girl!

I’ve seen some people recently that I hadn’t seen in a long time. So they’ve mentioned the weight loss. And that’s great. I’m back on track on eating, and I’ve not been off track on working out. And I’m on the lower end of my weight right now. I’ve been about three or four pounds lower than this but quite briefly. I think it was a fluke. Anyway, I’m 85 pounds lower than this time two years ago. That’s a lot. But I don’t see what others see when I look in the mirror. I hear the comments about my size and part of me thinks they’re mostly being nice. I’ve lost weight, yes. And it’s noticeable, yes. But I don’t see someone slim in the mirror. I just don’t. I don’t see a REALLY fat girl anymore, but she’s pretty chubby. And I know I can’t be. My daughter wears the same size. She’s slim. My coworker wears a size larger than me. She’s slim and fit. And also, I don’t believe she’s a size larger but the point is, I don’t see what other people see. I can sometimes in photos, but half the time I’m honestly not sure it’s me at first. It’s so frustrating. I hate it. It’s like I can never REALLY feel good about myself because I don’t feel like I look good.

3 thoughts on “Go away, fat girl!”

  1. I might be way off here, but it sounds like maybe you need to find a way to feel happier from the inside first – something that brings you joy and makes you feel good from the inside, this could be anything/anyone, a new experience or hobby – just something – then maybe you might start to see yourself differently on the outside if you’re glowing from the inside.

    I don’t think it matters what we look like – event the seemingly most model figured or faced people in the world don’t always feel good about themselves – because of how they feel inside – the mind and soul are very powerful.

    Wishing you lots of #feelgood vibes 🔆😊


    1. Thanks! I definitely have some self esteem issues but honestly working out has helped SO much with the happy. I feel so much better on the inside now, too. It’s just I want to actually see a slim and fit me in the mirror. And I don’t. I’m getting to where it’s less important to see her but I just don’t understand why.


  2. That’s great – they say exercise releases a natural high/happy chemical (endorphins I think) so hopefully that’s having an effect too. I don’t think there’s any woman (or man) who hasn’t had some sort of image/body insecurities at some point – either openly or in secret – not in this modern day society and all it’s unrealistic images and expectations – so hats off to you for being confident enough to be honest about yours – that’s what inspires others.

    Wishing you more #feelgood vibes 🔆😊


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